Serpentine Caress

Asgard is so quiet nowadays, you'd think those pussies were hiding something~ Or maybe they've taken a vow of silence like good little monks!

Except they're not good, chaste, or clean. We know which of you like to get your hands dirty~ I'll play dirty with you~ ♥ 

[Filtered to Niflheim]
Seriously, is it just me, or is everything more filtered than usual? Even I'm doing it! 

That was fun the other day, Reno~ You're very sexy when you get worked up! M'row! And Rufus, it was truly a pleasure to meet you~ You should join in next time! A threesome is always more interesting~
[/filtered]

One more week until the trial, bitches~ It looks like I'm facing one of Asgard's self-appointed white knights! 

Bonjour, Henry~ Has your girlfriend prepared for your funeral yet?  ♥ *Je veux que tu sois au paradis avant meme que le diable ne sache que tu sois mort.

And in other news, it seems that our darling Reverend Mark has lit a holy fire under my sexy ass~! He likes to talk about stoning like it's one of his favorite hobbies, and it makes me really want to say to him, "Mark-dah'ling, marijuana increases your risk for heart attack and schizophrenia!" Now that I think about it... OH! I do declare, that explains a lot about our resident holy man. 

Hmm, oh well~ Better not waste time~

ooc: * May you be in heaven half an hour before the devil knows you're dead.

Ha-ha-ha-ha, it seems that all that has happened to me is the gift of swanky new shoes~! You poor dah'lings have nothing on me~!

My feet have never looked so pretty! Does anybody here have a shoe fetish~? You can worship the shoes on my feet all you'd like! 

And pose!

Bravo, bravo, bravo, Frank! You managed to not humilate yourself when you stood up to me~ 

What a successful business transaction, no~? He saves Asgard from Mother Nature's wrath and I return to Niflheim with a lovely souvenir! We all win! The end~ 


[ooc: wild plants officially gone! Thanks for playing, guys~]

Now this is the weather that I'm talking about~ 

Sun-tanning season is on the waaaaaaaay!

[Private to Sal/Brandy]
Remember to watch your step around Asgard, dah'ling! Spring is a bit more vicious this year.

I had such a migraine yesterday~ Not that telling the truth is painful or anything. For instance!

I honestly believe that we should send a care package for Metatron! That nice girl Brandy was so kind and sweet in letting us know, and none of us at Niflheim said anything! Come on, my fellow comrades - he might be our enemy, but that doesn't mean we don't care~

We. Care. Very. Much.

Looks like I'm not hurt. So this is how the "nice" people do it~

The little twat  sweetheart Mello has been awfully quiet lately~ Think I should look in his room and see if there's any of that godawful, knock-off chocolate left over? If there isn't, we'll know he's gone bye-bye!

It's funny that Flauros should mention nightmares. I had one recently, where Kain was trying to feed me Mello's chocolate and give me a lap-dance while singing, "I'm too sexy for my cat, too sexy for my cat, oh pussy, oh pussy-cat." And he was wearing a speedo. Shudder! He doesn't even have the body for it!

I am, of course, just joshing you~

Well.

Loose lips sink ships, don't they? 

Sadly, while lots of free love was going around, I kept my legs closed searched to join some sisters at a nunnery and found my inner child! So at least I was semi-productive, in the end. 

And YOU, you people who normally shove sticks up your butts are nice but let out the big, fat, ugly, and meeeean old monster? Stop apologizing! Just enjoy the fact that you let out your Id for the day and suffered no real consequences, dah'lings! 

Boo.

Now sweethearts, don't bother Mello with your grotesque displays~ He's only human with a human stomach and human sensibilities. Like me! Real humans appreciate not having to walk underneath rotting intestine-garlands and dead fetus-mistletoes just to have a smoke~!

[Filtered to Sal, Banru, and Una - unhackable]
*snickers, giggles*

I love living here sometimes~

[/filtered]

Oh, I suppose I could smoke inside and no one would care~ It's too COLD!

I'm up for taking a stroll in Emptiness. Care to join me~?

Hmm, we'll just try again next time, ehhhh, team?

[Filtered to Niflheim, especially the Loser Representatives]
Lucifer is SO going to be pissed when he shows up. 

Y'all who obviously FAILED your riddles... Better run while you can, is my helpful advice~
[/filtered]

[Private - unhackable]
Ooooh, so that's where that sleeping beauty plant got to? All the way over to Asgard's forests? Hmm... and it got Alice and Lina to boot...

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!

*snickers* And I wasn't even trying! Too bad that plant was the only one of its kind in my arsenal. *sighs* I could have put the whole of Asgard to sleep, and we would have won... Well, damn. Next time!
[/private]

This outfit is SEXY! I'm wearing even less clothing than usual!

Why y'all so bitchy 'bout yours? Light has a reason, since he has no boobs with which to fill out his outfit. That's the pits. You want to borrow one of mine, dah'ling~? Even Sal and Mello get the joke!

Anyway, jokes aside, anyone keeping a countdown? Tick tock, tick tock~


[Warning: Outfit does cover what needs to be covered, but little else. ^^;; Wasn't a rule about the outfit actually fitting personality, right~?]

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

This barmaid has horded all the rum of Niflheim! If ye wants it, ye will have to fight me to the death for it!

Or ye may guess upon where upon my person a bottle has been hid. ^__~ Then ye may has it after ye retrieve it!

Jazz, ye may be first mate, but I mated with the Captain first. This is better than roleplaying!

Bucker up, ye mangy curs, ye godless dogs, drop the sails and gird thy loins! The cursed ship Niflheim is coming for YE! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

Y'all know what this means, right~?

Laisser les bons temps rouler~!

[ooc: Let the good times roll]

Yoohoo, bitches! 

I have come and I'm bringing SEXY back to Niflheim~

( Come under the covers ) 

Oooooh, I'm loving this jacuzzi~ I only went to my room long enough to get fresh clothes and the damn laptop and see how my homies were doing while I soak. Everyone's been soooo busy! And now we have more people! FRESH YUMMY MEAT YES YES YES! 

Well, I send a most pleasant welcome to you new dah'lings. *blows kisses at the screen* It's soooo good to be home~

[Voice post]

Mmmmmmmmy, mmmmmmy, bod-dy, mmmmmy body!!! Mmy beautiful body, BOD-DY! I'mm a mm-mum-mummy!!!! Who-who-who lives like thisss?!?!

Bandages, they're, they're sticky!!! This sk-skin nneeds moisturizer!! GROOOOOOOOOOOOOSSSSSSSSSSSSS! 

[*starts coughing hysterically*]

Wake-up, wake UP!

[*jaw pops off*]

[*gargles of alarm*]

Yes, Light, go to your room, take a time-out like the bad little boy you are~

I'm sure he's just ruminating about how he put his boy toy in "his place." What, do you think he's wallowing in guilt? Tah. Men and their little dominance games. 

Oh, and after you Asgardians find your little friend, I'd love to know who was responsible for the stunt...

THAT MADE ME RUIN MY NEW BOOTS!

[ooc: Yeah, I know, it's disgusting how her priorities are askew.]

I gots alcohol! Lots and lots of alcohol! Light is such a generous young idol, isn't he~? Give him a round of applause for helping me find a way to get drunk! Well done, well done. You will all suffer now through random broken doors, badly sung drinking songs, and have to dodge my oppressed libido! I'd fuck a zebra at this point. No sex for three weeks straight!

Don't get pissed yet, Sal, I won't throw any "wild parties" in our room~ I see our room personally as a place for sleeping not for fucking huge orgies social drinking~

I'm heading out to Emptiness soon. Lucifer wants us to explore, as I recall~ Backpack with daggers supplies, check. Walking boots for kicking ass, check. BOOZE, check! Oh yes, I am definitely ready.


[ooc: I'd start a thread, but maybe later, 'cause I am just swamped right now... x___x And don't ask about the zebra comment. XD]

Why is the rum and the vodka and the rest of the liquor always gone?

Foo, I have been sober since I arrived here. This must be fixed.